The Spanish Word for Pirate

Today we have a story in which a young child learns about other cultures.  He also learns about friendship, togetherness, and world peace, but not until EPCOT Center opens.  No, this story takes place way in the past, and the young child is me.

Let me ask you a question that I think I know the answer to.  Did many of you, as young children growing up on a yearly diet of Walt Disney World, ever collect park maps?  I think you probably did.  And if you were like me, you spent your formative years hiding in your room, poring over every little inch of marketing blurb, trying not to think about what the kids at school were saying about you, or wondering why mommy always had that worried frown on her face whenever she caught you tracing that logo for Adventureland (the cool one, with Shere Khan in it) .
Seriously!  Shere Khan!  How’s that for a rare character these days?
At the time, we just had the one park, so I had a nice tidy collection of Magic Kingdom guide maps.  You kids may not realize it, but these were actually booklets — stapled and everything — and each land had its own page, and each shop and each ride and each restaurant actually had a sentence of two describing what it was.  There would be a whole section devoted to photo tips, to let you know what speed you should shoot for fireworks, and where you could buy film, and even how to get it developed (do not worry if you didn’t understand any of that last sentence. Digital technology ruins everything).
When you go to the park as kids, you tend to focus on the rides, and ignore shops and restaurants.  Not so at home, when it is just as fun to read the marketing copy for the New Century Clock Shop as it was to read the blurb for Space Mountain.  One day while reading the map, I found a little restaurant in Adventureland that I had never heard of before.  In fact, it seemed to be written in a language I had never heard before.  It was called El Pirata Y El Parico and it is here that my journey begins.
There were many other shops and locales surrounding this restaurant on the map, many of which featured “Spanish curios,” and so I used my awesome powers of deduction to learn that this new language was probably Spanish, and I also began to develop a vague understanding of what a curio was (which I think is something like cross between a “curiosity” and an “oreo”).
In case you were wondering, the Spanish version of does not translate the restaurant name into English.  It also doesn’t translate “Blast-off Burger” into Spanish.
Since the restaurant was was across the street from Pirates of the Caribbean, it was not too far a leap to guess that “Pirata” was the Spanish word for “pirate.”  I’m not joking when I say I decoded this restaurant title like a cryptogram.  It was a shorter step still to figure out that “El” meant “The“, and a breathtaking leap of logic to understand that “Y” meant “And.”
For the longest time, the “Parico” eluded me.  But at some point I stumbled across a picture of the sign (maybe I even saw it in the park), and finally guessed at the last word.  At last I had the whole picture of what this restaurant was about.  The Pirate and the Parrot!
And after all that, what did any of this have to do with hot dogs?
Sure, it’s tacos now, but back then…
Anyway, I share all this with you because last week El Pirata Y El Parico opened under a new name:  Tortuga Tavern.  This obviously ties in with the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, and maybe they’re hoping it will engender some goodwill towards the restaurant (restaurante), since normally it never stays open past the afternoon parade.
Whoops, scratch that idea.  This was shot at dinner time at the “new” Tortuga Tavern.
Think of all the learning that has been lost.  Now kids will never know the pleasure of decoding foreign languages in theme park guide maps, and some day blogging about such sad activities to a vast audience of potential hecklers.  A bit of mystery has been lost from Adventureland.
On the other hand, maybe Disney is not as careless about such lost opportunities as it appears.
Same sign as above, only this time from inside looking out towards Pirates.  Hey, wait a second…
By the way, all my code cracking skills as a kid were not up to parsing shop names as cryptic as “Mlle. Lafayette’s Parfumerie,” which once graced the storefronts of Liberty Square.  Do you realize how old I was before I finally figured out what the heck “Mlle.” stood for?  It was after High School, I’ll tell you that.  And no, it is not “Milliam.”

Hidden Jafar Revisited

So last week I posted a picture of the Hidden Jafar at Animal Kingdom, and some of you — including my fellow resident parkeologist Teevtee — doubted its veracity.  To be honest, I don’t blame you.  I have been known to come up with some half baked notions and crazy conspiracy theories from time to time (though to be fair, I wasn’t the only one who thought he saw Elvis performing in several episodes of Doug Live — you know who you are)

Doug had his own stage show at Disney MGM Studios, don’t you remember?  Yeah, I didn’t think so.  But parkeologists never forget.

The Hidden Jafar really may be just a coincidence, but I did hear about it from an Animal Kingdom Cast Member.  As everyone knows, Cast Members never have bad information.  If it is a coincidence, it’s a pretty awesome one.  Just curious, for those of you who can’t see it…  Do you also have problems with those Magic Eye posters?  I’ve had people tell me those aren’t real either.  But they are real, and so is the Loch Ness Monster.  Trust me, I’ve received several insulting emails from Nessie (sea serpents hate my guts).

This photo was snapped just a couple weeks ago.  Really, it made the news!  And if this isn’t incontrovertible proof of a giant prehistoric monster living in a Socttish pond, I don’t know what is. 
Anyway, I stand by my photo of the Hidden Jafar, and through awkward, amateurish use of photoshop I have attempted to give you a point of reference below.  If you still think I’m hallucinating, all I can do is refer you to Acts 2:15.

Tell me:  Am I imagining it??

Just for kicks, here is a Magic Eye image.  The first person who tells me what the secret image is will win a free subscription to parkeology.

Hint:  The prize is worthless

Villains in the Mist

There are good animals and there are bad animals.  Gorillas I think must be bad animals.  For one thing, they stink.  Ever wonder what that smell is at the exit to Kiliminjaro Safari?  Putrid, vomitable gorilla.
They are also only marginally cute even as babies, which is tough to do in the animal world.  And they have a reputation for flinging certain items that you don’t want to have flung at you.
Disgusting, right?
But I think the biggest indicator is that they are attracted to villains.  Despicable people like Jane Goodall and Sigourney Weaver.  If you’re hanging with that crowd, it’s a sure bet you end up in juvy by your 10th birthday.
It’s not hard to envision this face on the “FBI’s MOST WANTED” list.  That look is pure rage.
The gorillas at Animal Kingdom live in the aptly named “Pangani Forest.”  This area used to be called “Gorilla Falls,” but that title proved far too confusing for tourists, who were just trying to find out where to see gorillas.  As is the case with most tourist attractions, Disney thought it wise to make a more explicit title based on a coastal village in Tanzania.
You might be wondering what Villains have to do with any of this.  So let me spell it out for you.  When I say “Coastal Tanzanian Gorilla Village,” what Disney villain immediately springs to mind?
Gorillas love this guy.
If you said Clayton, then you are close.  If you said Scar, then you are even closer.  If you said Bette Midler in Beaches, than you probably need to seek mental help.  But the most obvious answer is Jafar.
The movie Aladdin is clearly based in a Tanzanian coastal village and features several gorillas in prominent roles.  At least in the Rod Serling version.  The best part is when they discover the remains of the Cave of Wonders on the beach at the end.  Love that twist ending.
The DisneyQuest on the Planet of the Apes features a Statue of Liberty slide.
And really, how else can you explain the visage of Jafar in the middle of Pangani Forest Exploration Trail?  If you don’t remember seeing it, you need to look closer.  Awhile back, we chronicled the “Hidden Baloo” over in Harambe village (which made sense, since The Jungle Book is set in the middle of a bustling African city).  Now we bring you the “Hidden Jafar”.
This is the first bridge in the main Gorilla area, looking back towards the entrance.
Still don’t see it?  It’s really just his face.  His craggy, timeworn face.

And for the record, we are still not done uncovering random hidden things in Animal Kingdom.  There’s actually another one near Jafar, and it’s not a hidden Iago.  But that’s for another time.