What if Disneyland Arrived 60 Years Too Late?

Try to imagine, just for a moment, a giant space monster punching Father Time right in the teeth. A punch hard enough to jar loose sixty years. A half-dozen meaningless decades. A skip on the record player of history. Now imagine that this cataclysmic punch occurred in 1901. History shrugs it off. Life finds a […]

Alternate Fantasy – Bizarro Adventureland

The strangest thing about Disneyland’s Adventureland is that the Treehouse is in the middle of the motherlovin’ sidewalk. It’s no secret that I have an unhealthy fascination with Magic Kingdom’s Swiss Family Treehouse. I love the way it’s perched out there on its own plant-infested island, sweltering in the hot florida sun. I love that […]

Adventureland Oddities

With Teevtee off galavanting through famed naturalist John Muir’s back yard, I figured I should probably get off my lazy butt and post something good here. But instead I went to Magic Kingdom. It was a nice stroll through the park near sunset, which is probably my favorite time of day to visit (my second […]

Stocks and Bongos

The most evil buzzword in the theme park industry today is “interactive” (followed closely by “guest experience,” and rounded out by “Potter-killer.”)  I’m a traditionalist, darn it, and I prefer my theme parks shaken, not stirred.  If I have to hear about another “living character initiative” or “NextGen project,” I think I’m going to have […]

The Spanish Word for Pirate

Today we have a story in which a young child learns about other cultures.  He also learns about friendship, togetherness, and world peace, but not until EPCOT Center opens.  No, this story takes place way in the past, and the young child is me. Let me ask you a question that I think I know […]