The Universe of Energy closing date is almost upon us. Those clever vampires in Disney Merchandising are already selling t-shirts featuring the word “Extinct.” It gives me some ideas about how to monetize my own funeral. This is not the first vintage Disney ride to close. It’s not even the best. In the late 90s, […]
Ellen’s Energy Adventure
Watch Out For These 5 Offensive Pre-Shows at Disney Theme Parks
Last summer, Disney shockingly altered the pre-show to Rock ‘n’ Roller Coaster Starring Aerosmith to remove a crude hand gesture by the band’s lead singer. Now that it’s safe to enjoy the underwear-sponsored attraction and its family-friendly Aerosmith songs about steamy love-making in a roller coaster, Disney can finally turn its attention to the remaining […]
Why Stupid Judy is the Smartest Human on the Planet
Dr. Judy Peterson may be a professor at the prestigious University of Energy, but her biggest claim to fame is losing a TV game show to her former college roommate, a sore winner who calls her Stupid Judy. Wait, did I call Ellen a sore winner? Sorry. I meant Ellen is a sore cheater. She […]