Return to Opening Day: Magic Kingdom 1971

Put on those bellbottoms, grab yourself a bandana, and brush out that Afro. We’re traveling to the groovy 70s, baby, for a date with destiny! Here age relives fond memories of the past and all that. Opening Day crowds were estimated to go as high as 100,000 people — all of them crammed onto I-4 […]

Where the Merchandise Dances for YOU

It is Christmastime again. The lights are strung, the stockings are hung, and giant bedecked evergreens have appeared out of nowhere in the central plazas of the theme parks. In the tantalizing shop windows along Hollywood Boulevard, the Dancing Minnie Globe Ornament Rockettes have reappeared. O Dancing Minnie Globe Ornament Rockettes, why do you mesmerize […]

The Top 20 Disney Theme Park Songs Of All Time

I have an entire iTunes playlist called “Disney Theme Park Music” because I don’t know what is going on with these modern songs. It’s all loud rock-n-roll with kids shaking their hips and whatnot. What happened to those bygone days when a “Taylor Swift” was something seen during a riveting bird-watching expedition? I wish we […]

There is Just One Moon And One Golden Sun

If the Sherman Brothers taught us anything in It’s a Small World, it’s that there is just one moon and one golden sun. And a smile means friendship to everyone unless you’re a mentally unstable Batman villain or a crocodile. But will someone please call the fire department? I don’t mean to cause any panic, […]