On the occasion of Disney’s Animal Kingdom 20th Anniversary, we reflect on its celebration of all animals — living, imaginary, and extinct. And since we’re Parkeology, we’re going to focus on that last part with a Top 20 Countdown to Extinction. It’s fast! It’s a blast! It’s in the past! 20. Poached Elephants Kilimanjaro Safari […]
Lost and Abandoned Disney Details
These Original Fantasyland Dark Rides Have Desperately Unhappy Endings
“Fantasyland is dedicated to the young and the young-at-heart, for they are most susceptible to nightmares. All that lurks here is graphic death, horror, and eternal damnation. Abandon all hope, ye who enter.” — Fantasyland Dedication Plaque, July 17, 1955 You want happily ever after? Go to Universal or something. We’re peddling unhappy endings here. […]
Recent Discovery! Long-Lost Epcot Double-Decker Bus Found!
Rides disappear all the time. Some were classics that fans still mourn to this day. The Epcot double-decker bus, however, was not. In case you don’t remember, the double-decker buses were a motorized option around World Showcase for people who balked at walking a 1.2-mile loop. My old Birnbaum’s Guide from 1994 shows bus stops […]
35 Freaky Flashbacks to Celebrate the Epcot 35th Anniversary
Epcot has always been a strange theme park concept. In honor of the Epcot 35th Anniversary, here are 35 loony details from its history.
The Great Movie Ride’s LAST secret
This is the coolest part of the Great Movie Ride you have NEVER seen: We all know about Big Al’s bloody saddle but have you ever heard of the Great Movie Ride’s bloody shirt? Thanks to a kind reader and original cast member who helped open the Great Movie Ride in 1989 we have unearthed […]
How to Cope When Disney Closes Your Favorite Ride
The Universe of Energy closing date is almost upon us. Those clever vampires in Disney Merchandising are already selling t-shirts featuring the word “Extinct.” It gives me some ideas about how to monetize my own funeral. This is not the first vintage Disney ride to close. It’s not even the best. In the late 90s, […]
Monsters on Main Street: The Horrifying Masks of The House of Magic
Terror Lurked in the Magic Kingdom Fathers stroll down Main Street hand in hand with their daughters, mothers wrangle the brood keeping everyone on schedule. It’s opening time at The Magic Kingdom and nothing could be more charming or innocent. Yet once there was something much more sinister at play here. Not long ago The […]
Ship of Theseus Paradox Endangers Universal Studios
In the first century A.D., noted Greek philosopher and one-time Hunger Games architect Plutarch proposed a thought experiment called the Ship of Theseus. In this puzzle, the Athenians carefully preserved the favorite vessel of hilarious jungle skipper Theseus, setting it up in a permanent museum called One Greek’s Dream, where they charged admission to school […]
50 Greatest Park Characters: The Oddballs
If you missed Ted’s cards from last week, click here! I hold in my hand the last five cards. Well, not the last last five. Ted will reveal those next week. But this is my last chance to talk about the super cool deck of vintage trading cards from the 80s, a deck that dared […]