It happened during the week between Christmas and New Year’s. A week when the parks are so crowded, you have to wait in line just to scoff at the latest DVC sales booth. I’m pretty sure this was an “Apocalyptic Crowds Season” deal, and that this will not become a regular occurrence in Adventureland. But for a brief […]
Ben Franklin is an unrepentant theme park windbag and he deserves to have his butt kicked. I’m not going to focus on the petty stuff, because that is beneath me. If you want to wear your stringy dishwater hair like a half-bald Michael Bolton, more power to you. Nor will I pick on his frilly-suit/white-socks ensemble. […]
Effective December 6, the Corp has unexpectedly ceased all space missions and recalled dozens of starships back to base, following allegations of corruption and mismanagement within the High Command. At the center of this debacle, of course, is the infamous Admiral EO. EO is no stranger to controversy. When he first joined the Corp in the early […]
Fan-favorite Star Wars character Jar Jar Binks has been elevated to an expanded role in the 4-year-old ride Star Tours ride, thanks to the Disney marketing machine. This move is no doubt intended to counteract the potential fall-out from another recent change to the ride: The addition of an entire sequence based on a scene from The Force Awakens, which […]
If you’re wondering why the blog has been so quiet this year, here’s the answer. I’ve just finished writing a new book called Arabian Heist. It’s funny, adventurous, and magical—exactly the types of things Parkeology has focused on for five years now. The book is not about theme parks, but if you like this blog, then we probably like the same kinds of […]
The Walt Disney Family Museum closes in just under three hours and I’m still exploring the lobby. It includes a setting from the Disneyland firehouse apartment, portraits of Walt’s two daughters by someone named Norman Rockwell, and hundreds of personal awards and trophies. The staff – dressed in red button-up sweaters that are part Walt […]
The concept is a bit strange. Pay a hundred bucks for the right to dress up in nice clothes and go to a theater to watch a full orchestra play background music from cartoons. It’s even crazier when you’re a theme park fan and you spend half the time relating various peripheral melodies to your […]
Try to imagine, just for a moment, a giant space monster punching Father Time right in the teeth. A punch hard enough to jar loose sixty years. A half-dozen meaningless decades. A skip on the record player of history. Now imagine that this cataclysmic punch occurred in 1901. History shrugs it off. Life finds a […]
Most of us when we go to the movies are there to actually watch the movie. I mean, I like cup holders and adolescent groping as much as the next guy. But if I’m going to spend the yearly wage of a Nike factory worker to sit in a darkened room for two hours, I want […]